Please make a note:
Just because I sit next to where the spare paper is kept does not mean that I know where it all goes.
Just because I sit near the printer does not mean that I know how to fix it when it breaks.
Just because I sit near the fax machine does not mean that I know if you need to dial 9 to get out.
Just because I sit near the HR manager's office does not mean that I know where he is.
Just because there is a copying machine located right outside my cube does not mean that I know where to get the staples for it, or how to load the automatic stapler.
Just because all of the little office supply stuff happens to be right next to my cube does not mean I am your damn secretary!!
The feral Sandpanther
(Please do not pet the feral kitty. Please do not taunt the feral kitty. Please do not ask the feral kitty things that you can figure out on your own if you were to try and use your feeble little brain. The feral Sandpanther thanks you for your cooperation, and promises not to gnaw any limbs off, as long as these simple rules are followed.)