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19 March 2004 @ 10:58 am
Can't Concentrate...  


Yesterday I got nothing done thanks to a 3 1/2 hour long performance review. It went okay, nothing really unexpected nor horrible. It almost sounds like they are contemplating making the job something other than the dreary, exhausting, frustrating bore that it is. Nonetheless, I am not, not, not, n-o-t, NOT, no way, uh-uh, not happening, no way in hell, absolutely NOT staying. My goals for the year remain unaltered: buy a house and move down the Penninsula, and get a new job. Absolutely. Unswearvingly.

Back in January they seemed such fine goals. Sure, accomplishing them would be a bit of a stretch and a lot of hard work. But they were managable and with a lot of work I knew I could achieve them. Anyway, I needed a challenge to push myself.

Then February came along, with it's ever-sliding down a slippery slope of continued disappointment, frustration, and burn-out.

Now, I can't even tell if March is better than Feb. was or not. My scale on "good" or "bad" has been reset so far off that I don't really know what "good" is any more. My brain has gone on strike, and refuses to work. It's decided that it needs a day off. I gave it an enforced day off Sunday (largely because I was feeling so ill that I really couldn't do anything.) What more does it want? Selfish, demanding little thing. Humph.

Anyway, that was my whine for the moment. Still lots of suck and lots of burn out. I think in the end it will lead to something better, but the end is so far off that I can't even the the light on the front of the train that I just know is waiting to hit me, once I get a little farther down the tunnel.

Oh, and does it come as any surprise that the DSL is still out? Yeah, I didn't think so. It's been two weeks, and counting. I don't recommend Earthlink's tech support. They keep telling us to do stupid things, like look at stuff on various web pages. Yes, well, I'll make sure to do that -- just as soon as you restore my (*$@# Internet service. Okay? Okay! *short angry Sandpanther chop*
 
 
Current Mood: burnt out
 
 
 
Cirdancirdan_havens on March 20th, 2004 08:08 am (UTC)
:/ *hugs* *knows of no other way to comfort you* *hugs again*