*decides that it would be wise to gnash on some echninacea-vitamin C gummie bears*

Gummy Bears: Oh no! She's coming. Hang tight together, everyone!

Me: *reaches into the bottle to pry gummy bears free*

Gummy Bears: She's trying to pull us apart. Keep hanging on! Oh no, she got Bob!!

Me: You will fall before me, feeble gummy bears! *bites Bob's head off*




Someone in a dream saying "I give you my word as Grundy."





Over the weekend we had a critical program shut down, causing me to come in to work on Saturday to get it (and other critial things that hadn't started correctly) back up. Monday, I went to talk to my boss about my findings.

Boss: I don't think we restarted that program on Thursday (when we restored the server.)

Me: No, actually, we did.

Boss: No, I don't think so.

Me: Actually, we did.

Boss: No, listen to me.

Me: I think you need to start listening to me, and trusting that I know what I'm talking about. The log says that the program was started up, and the last good run was at 10:15 AM on Friday.

Boss: I think you need to learn how to have a reasonable conversation with me. How do you know that the program was started up?


Me: There is a log which records when the last good run was, which stated that the last good run was on Friday at 10:15 AM. Which I stated in the e-mail I sent to you on this issue. Also, you were sitting right there on Thursday when I started the program up. And on Friday, I reported to you that there was a problem with the program which had been fixed, and the program was confirmed to be working. And I sent you e-mail telling you about that. And documented it in the Bug Log. And gave you the Bug Log number in my weekly status report. So yes, I know that we started the program back up again on Thursday.

I think I'm done being polite to my asshole coworkers when they're being fuckwits. Maybe calling it like I see it rather than pussyfooting around might actually get farther than this whole "being nice" thing is doing.

Oh and the boss? Didn't even appologize for his stupidity.